Red Table Talk Post-Mortem: Leave Jordyn Woods Alone!
Y’all, we’re emotional. Jordyn Woods‘ Red Table Talk interview was a roller coaster, but it can all be summed up by the iconic Killers line: “How’d it end up like this, it was only a kiss (it was only a kiss).”
Honestly, I don’t know if Jordyn is telling the truth, but if she is, this whole situation is massively messed-up. Jordyn repeatedly offers to take a lie detector test to prove her story, and I hope to God that happens because if her story is true, that girl is more innocent than even she’ll admit. I wrote this interview recap while watching Red Table Talk in real-time, and I’m keeping it as is so that y’all can see my opinion change right before your very eyes, like the world’s b*tchiest magic trick. TBH, I don’t even know what to believe anymore.
The episode started with an explanation of what we already know: Jordyn has been friends with the Smith Family since she was an infant, Jordyn met her best friend Kylie Jenner through the Smiths, and Jordyn hooked up with Khloe Kardashian‘s baby daddy, Tristan Thompson. We could already tell from Will Smith‘s amazing fatherly advice that this wasn’t going to be one of those unbiased interviews where people try to set aside their personal issues for ~journalistic integrity~ or whatever, but we weren’t expecting Jada Pinkett-Smith to open the interview by basically telling haters to leave Jordyn alone and get off of her stream. Sorry, J, but there’s a difference between “everyone makes mistakes” and “let’s forgive Jordyn for cheating with her close friend’s boyfriend.” Like, husband-stealing isn’t exactly on the level of accidentally starting a massive rumor or cheating on a test. Everyone makes mistakes, but this was a Mistake.
Jordyn tells her version of what happened: She went out to dinner with friends, then back to a bar where there was a party happening aka SHOREbar, which has been known. She said her and Tristan were doing their own thing, not hanging out, but “normal LA culture” led her to tag along with her friends to an after-party at Tristan’s place. It was just a coincidence that she was there, he didn’t invite her, and she wasn’t aware of the whole “everyone’s phones got taken away before she got there” weirdness. She said she didn’t realize it was weird that she was there, but she, like, compared it to being at a friend’s “ex’s” house… that mindset is probably where she first went wrong since he was still dating Khloe, but whatever.
She kind of implies that her friends should have stopped her, which is fair, but it’s cool of her to cop to the fact that they shouldn’t ruin their own lives just to defend Jordyn’s actions. Jordyn’s like “I wasn’t sitting on his lap, it was just my legs over his d*ck” (we’re paraphrasing) as if that isn’t clear flirting, and says that he didn’t try to hit on her that night and multiple people partyed with them until 7AM. It almost sounds like she’s trying to deny that anything happened, but then she admits that Tristan chastely kissed her on the lips on the way out. Um, what? And then she walked out. WHAT?!
Are we saying it was just one tongueless kiss that caused all of this B.S.?
Jordyn said she didn’t mention the kiss to Khloe to protect her heart. But wouldn’t it have been easier to just tell her he kissed her once instead of letting it blow up like this? Tristan has literally been caught motorboating women in a club while his GF gives birth to their son. This kind of pales in comparison, even if Jordyn is basically Khole’s sister.
*Tristian cheats several times before this story about him and Jordyn Woods comes out*
Khloe Kardashian: MY FAMILY IS IN SHAMBLES AND ITS ALL YOUR FAULY JORDYN
Everybody else: pic.twitter.com/I9p6DMoW4Y
— 🍀Celtics James🍀 (@jtmusick31) March 1, 2019
Jordyn reveals Tristan and her never slept together, they never even made-out, and they never will. Jordyn points out that the media took a black woman who made a mistake, and “not a mistake that’s worth public crucifixion,” and turned into the biggest scandal of the year. Jada brings back the classic quote that black women are the most disrespected on Earth, and explains why the Smith family is standing by Jordyn and holding her through all of this.
“The arms that I thought would be around me are nowhere to be found,” Jordyn said, clearly referring to how she’s been thrown aside by the Kardashians while people are sending her death threats. Her family can’t leave the house, including her twelve-year-old sister to go to school, just because of one kiss. Jordyn keeps saying that she’ll take full responsibility for what happened, which is cool, but I’d say it’s like 70% Tristan’s fault (for being an *sshole who was definitely trying to get her to stay with him), 25% her fault (for a total lack of situational awareness), and 5% the Kardashians’ fault (for acting like this is so much worse than it actually was).
TL;DR: Jordyn’s only fault was being in the wrong situation at the wrong time, which could happen to any of us. If she’s telling the truth, then this is something that could have easily happened to literally anyone, and we actually *should* all show her a little compassion. Letting Khloe’s BF kiss her was pretty bad, but not “ruin her life” level of bad. The real moral of the story is that Jada Pinkett-Smith is always right, and our cover photo should look more like this:
Of course, there are always two sides to the story, and twenty minutes after the interview aired, Khloe had this to say:
Why are you lying @jordynwoods ?? If you’re going to try and save yourself by going public, INSTEAD OF CALLING ME PRIVATELY TO APOLOGIZE FIRST, at least be HONEST about your story. BTW, You ARE the reason my family broke up!
— Khloé (@khloekardashian) March 1, 2019
Didn’t Khloe lowkey allegedly get with Tristan while his last GF was pregnant with his kid, though? It’s fully not at all Khloe’s fault that she got cheated on, but a little compassion for Jordyn could be nice here.
Unless the Kardashians finally weigh in (probably during the next season of their reality show in roughly a million years), there’s really no way to know who’s telling the truth. Until then, let’s just refrain from bullying people we don’t know on the internet and silently enjoy the drama.