Entertainment

The Bachelorette Week 12:
A Drinks Date > Engagement

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ABC

We made it, everyone! Last night Hannah Brown’s journey as the Bachelorette came to a thrilling and dramatic ending. But first let me catch you up on Monday’s happenings before we dive in. Click the link if you missed it, but without further adeiu — we’re gonna jump right into The Bachelorette finale part 2 recap.

Chris Harrison begins the evening by welcoming us to the sh*tshow already in progress. It’s an evening he promises will be full of lies and betrayal. Which is exactly how I like my love stories to end. Neil Lane emerges, fresh from his year-long slumber to cobble some ring options for Tyler C. and Jed Wyatt. Tyler goes with a square-cut halo that encapsulates his “loud and proud” girl while Jed goes with an oval that he feels best symbolizes how constant their relationship is. Riiiight.


Hannah begins her morning in bed where she shares that she’s still unsure about who she will choose. This is not ideal if you’re planning on getting engaged that very day, but God, this franchise really is something. She’s nervous as she gets ready for the final rose ceremony, slipping on a white beaded gown so beautiful I don’t even recognize her until she puts on sapphire costume jewelry and then I’m like, “Oh, it’s Hannah.”

In the van to the ceremony, a panicked Hannah asks if they can pull over so she can collect herself, but she slips and falls on the hill, skinning her arm before having to be scooped up by the season’s most heinous villain, stylist Cary Fetman. “I really can’t do this,” she tells production. But eventually, she is able to pull herself together and off she goes to break someone’s heart and hopefully end a music career that never took off (Hi, Peter. Miss you).

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ABC

A supercut of both Tyler and Jed — who brought his guitar to act as a giant right flag — ends… with Tyler getting out of the van first. You know what that means on The Bachelorette finale.

Damn it.

Bold choice to wear blue to your own funeral. I would’ve gone with coral.

Tyler launches into a beautiful speech about their journey both individually and as a couple. He says he feels that Hannah is the reason he’s grown so much during his time on this television show. It’s touching and heartfelt and his penmanship could use some work, but that’s okay. You either have the beauty or the brains and he is a very pretty boy.

Tyler is pouring his heart out, but a visibly nervous Hannah stops him halfway through his speech. “Tyler…” she trails off, not meeting his gaze. Without having to go on, Tyler acknowledges that Hannah is about to make a huge mistake.

“This isn’t it?” he says as the cameraperson/my best friend zooms in on the tears welling in his eyes. She tells him that she’s in love with someone else and it looks like Tyler wants to start sobbing, but all he says is that he’s still rooting for her and he wishes her and Jed nothing but the best. So I’ll sob for him.

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ABC

She walks Tyler to the car and while he winds down the road away from Hannah, and he begins to cry as he shares his pain and disbelief with production. “It feels like a million uppercuts to the gut right now.” We get it, you work out.

Back in the studio, Chris poses the question: Will Hannah get her Bachelorette happy ending? Well if she would’ve chosen Tyler maybe she would have. I’ve seen him give massages.

Jed gets out of the van with his guitar and America reflects on the days when guitars were illegal on The Bachelorette. Jed tells Hannah that the light inside of her is brighter than he ever could have ever imagined, but we’ve all come to learn that she’s actually quite dim. Jed says that talking is hard for him sometimes and then we all realize what Chris Harrison meant when he said “cringeworthy.” Jed sings Hannah a song about their love that is, thankfully, only one verse long. Hannah professes her love for him still and then Jed gets down on one knee and asks Hannah Brown to be his Mr. Right Girl.

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ABC

But uh… there’s a whole ass hour left — longer, actually. And back in Los Angeles, Chris Harrison tells us that Jed is about to face the music. I hope it’s his. He deserves it.

When we get back from commercial, Hannah catches us up on what’s happened since that afternoon in Greece, but she’s referring to Jed in the past tense. And then she drops the bomb we’ve waited all season for. The news that Jed arrived at the mansion having ended a serious relationship just one week prior. Hannah tells the story that Jed told her the day after their engagement — he broke off something ~casual~ when he discovered he’d be leaving for the show.

Naturally, Hannah wasn’t thrilled but took his word that the relationship wasn’t serious. It wasn’t until People magazine’s article about Jed’s ex-girlfriend and fellow aspiring country artist Haley Stevens complete with text messages, love notes, and receipts. It turns out their relationship was much more serious than Jed led Hannah to believe. Maybe if they stayed together, they could have made an appearance as one of those unknown country artists the couples on The Bachelor / The Bachelorette have to slow dance to.

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ABC

The confrontation has to happen and it might even be happening in the same Airbnb that Arie Luyendyk used to dump Becca Kufrin. He ultimately reveals that he and Haley went on international vacations together and he even told Haley he loved her. About one trip they took, Hannah asks “just y’all two?”, and he justifies it saying, “I got the cabin for free!”

But he insists it wasn’t a relationship. She even confronts him about the messages she received on Instagram from two women who claimed they were hanging out with him the night after his hometown date. Hannah says it feels like this entire experience was taken away from her because she was only told half the story. The other half was sung. Jed keeps apologizing and asking Hannah what he can do to fix this, but she tells him the ring doesn’t mean the same thing to her anymore. And then she takes it off.

Somewhere, Neil Lane doubles over. He knows.

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ABC

Chris Harrison welcomes us to the studio where we will spend the rest of the evening dragging this out and it’s about to get messier than the Democratic debate I’m not watching. I’ll see the highlights tomorrow, promise.

When Hannah comes out on stage, she is met by overwhelming support from the audience, but she’s still having a hard time. Chris asks her to walk him through her discovery of the news. She says that when the article came out, Jed came clean about Haley and since then, things have been difficult. When Chris asks where they stand, Hannah announces that the engagement is officially off. After all, who can build a relationship on lies and poorly written choruses?


When it’s time for Jed to join her on the couch, a single person begins to clap and then changes their mind as Jed hugs and then takes a seat next to Hannah. It. Is. Awkward.

Chris gives Jed the opportunity to tell Hannah whatever he needs to tell her. Jed apologizes for taking this experience away from her and tells her he still loves her, but that ship has sailed and Hannah is seasick. Hannah begins pretty optimistically, sharing hopes that Jed might grow and work on himself as a person… for somebody else in the future. Just like that, Hannah helped Jed write the best breakup jingle of the year. These dog food commercials are about to get really bleak.


After the commercial, Hannah tells Jed that all of this has changed how she feels about her. She says that she doesn’t love him which is met by unwanted applause. “We’re done and that’s not something to clap about.” But Jed understands and he accepts it.


Chris Harrison announces that he has a gift for us. Tyler is coming out next so he and Hannah can come face-to-face for the first time since their Grecian breakup. Hannah tells Chris her feelings have not gone away which is met by plenty of “woos!” from the ladies in the audience. When Tyler comes out, the sexual tension is palpable and if the crowd would shut up we might be able to hear the cute things they’re murmuring to each other. Chris Harrison jokes that “It’s like the Beatles walked in!”

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ABC

Tyler says that the breakup was difficult, but he was sure that the strong and proud Hannah he knew would bounce back. Can Hannah get her eyes checked because she just keeps missing what is right in front of her?
Hannah tells Tyler that she still has feelings for him. When Chris Harrison asks her to expand on that, Hannah smiles as she says to Tyler “You’re an incredible guy and I’m a single girl.” It seems that Tyler is better at math than he is at English because he’s able to put two-and-two together and accepts a date. Is this the first year that a Bachelorette finale ended with a drinks date instead of an engagement?

“We can ship this!” Chris exclaims before he sends her off to Jimmy Kimmel.


And that’s my story everyone! It was a lot of ups and downs, but in the end, I got what I wanted. I’m engaged and Hannah isn’t. Ha-ha.

See you next week when Bachelor In Paradise begins. For those of you who are new to the franchise, buckle up. What, you thought The Bachelorette was a bumpy ride?

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