Everyone Is Talking About Netflix’s Gossip Girl Description Even Though We’ve Known About It For Years
Today, I woke up and it was 2014 again. At least, that’s what it felt like when I opened my laptop and Twitter was freaking out over Netflix’s description for Gossip Girl, which has led to other sites like E! News, Teen Vogue, and US Weekly reporting on how ~crazy~ it is that the show has such as savage description on Netflix. When I established that I hadn’t gone full Phil of The Future and woken up in an alternate timeline, I realized that we’ve all been reporting on a Netflix summary that we’ve known about since it first started streaming on Netflix.
Netflix: “let’s get someone who fuckin hates Gossip Girl to write the description of Gossip Girl” pic.twitter.com/BewiyilXmK
— Lane Moore (@hellolanemoore) December 11, 2018
“Rich, unreasonably attractive private school students do horrible, scandalous things to each other. Repeatedly,” reads the Netflix description of the classic CW teen soap. It’s a spot-on description that I’ve laughed at every time I’ve logged onto my Netflix account to rewatch that episode when Serena Van Der Woodsen gets drunk on Thanksgiving and her mom just thinks it’s a turkey coma or the one when a bunch of hot rich teenagers break into a pool and the administration immediately tries to pin it on the only scholarship student in attendance. Something about Gossip Girl just reminds me of home. Anyway, the point here is that today was such a slow news day that the media is reporting on a Netflix description that has existed on and off for at least three years. Honestly, I think its been around for longer but the earliest evidence I can find is this Reddit post from 2015.
From my extensive research, I learned that the other description for Gossip Girl on the website was also hilarious: “A group of hyperprivileged Manhattan private-school kids seem to get away with everything.” Still, I think the funniest thing to come out of today’s random resurgence of interest in the Gossip Girl description is that people were still reporting on it as recently as November 11 of this year and somehow no one cared then. I’m going to give everyone who decided today was the day to jump on this news the same advice my mother gave me when I was in high school (ironically around the time this news was actually relevant): Stop trying to be like everyone else and just be yourself!
As much as I love a blast from the past, I’d really prefer it if we’d all return to the sleek top-knot trend everyone was rocking the last time this story was relevant, or maybe we could recreate the 2015 #OscarsSoWhite controversy now that Regina King has been egregiously snubbed of a SAG Award nomination. We could also focus on news stories that are actually relevant, like Nicki Minaj saying she would marry her current boyfriend aka convicted rapist Kenneth Petty. Quick side note: why is everyone calling Kenneth Petty a “sex offender” when he’s literally a rapist. Let’s not sugar coat it.
Honestly, though, I’m just glad this means that more people are actually still streaming Gossip Girl because if that show ever gets taken off of Netflix, I’ll have to do something I swore I’d never do again: buy the DVD box set.