Mind & Body

Ask An Expert: How to Make Your Summer Fling Last

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Consider Your Partner’s Qualities

It’s fantastic that you’re enjoying spending time with your significant other/fling/bae/whatever-you-want-to-call-them. Having a good time can make you want to take things further, but it is a wise idea to take a step back and objectively consider your partner and whether they are committed relationship material.

“The way we select partners for short-term encounters can differ wildly from when we are seeking a longer-term relationship. In a summer fling, chemistry, attraction, and enjoying the same activities fosters connection,” points out Rebecca Newman, MSW, LCSW, a psychotherapist in Philadelphia. “But when you’re seeking a committed relationship, you may prioritize having shared values in addition to chemistry, attraction, and shared interest.” If you want to extend your summer fling, Newman says the first thing to ask yourself is if this is a partnership that seems sustainable. Be honest with yourself. “It’s okay if you’re not quite ready for the fling to end, although that is different than the relationship having a long-term future,” she says.

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